I'm still alive!

Tired, busy, crazy, but still alive. 

Ours plans for moving are pretty much finalized, and the hubby will be flying in 2 weeks from today.  So I'm sorting, packing, giving away, throwing away, attempting to sale.  Plus cleaning, washing, Halloweeeeening, home with a sick little girl, suppose to be helping my mother plan my graduation party, dealing with family issues.  And I've sort of lost track of my Internet life.  Truthfully, now that I'm finished with school, I'm just enjoying not having to be on the computer every day! 

I'm sure I'll be a little touch and go around here for the next 3 weeks or so, between the getting ready to move, driving across the country, and getting settled over there.  I will be back though! :)

As for the packing, it's not all bad.  I came across my journal a few days ago, one that I I start and stop regularly.  [I love to write, but life gets in the way often!]  But, flipping through said journal was a nice experience.  The post weren't always positive, it's seen some rough patches, but one post was all it took to remind me why all of this craziness and sacrificing over the last year have been worth it. 

In November of 2008 I wrote:
"Every piece of ME is attached to HIM.  Every thought I have can be linked to HIM.  HE owns my heart, my soul, me world.  I could never go a day without HIM by my side.  I could never survive that type of life.  I tell HIM everything.  I stare at HIM, thankful that HE's mine.  And so life goes."
I love him.  And he's my best friend.  And we've been through hell and back.  And we're still in love.  Therefore, it will all be worth it. 

Good things come to those who wait. Right?

I wasn't really sure what I should title this post.  But then I'm not really sure what I'll end up saying either... though I do hope to keep it on the nice side...

You see, approximately 6 and a half years ago I told my family that I was engaged.   I was thrilled.  They were not.  No one said a word, just stood by while they waited for what I'm sure they all expected to be a failure on my part.  At the time, I was 17, about to turn 18.  I was about to graduate from one of the top ten schools in the nation.  I had been accepted to every university I had applied to and was already talking of moving a few hours away to school.  I was the good girl, the "smart one", the one with the big future. 

But I did this crazy thing.  I fell in love.  Like, head over heels, without a doubt, this is it kind of crazy in love.  And I never even questioned giving it all up for him.  I knew I would still go to school eventually, and I knew I would still have big dreams.  But for me, he was a part of those big dreams, and I couldn't walk away from that. 

We were married a month after I graduated and turned 18.  We moved to South Carolina with the Navy and I spent the next year being a step-mom and a wife, and loving it.  Our little girl was born two months after I turned 20.  I started school before she was even a month old.  I found myself in school, with a newborn, and working as a retail manager... and still madly in love and loving my life.  And still, (almost) everyone doubted me.

Through five moves, two babies, days of complete chaos and others of simplicity, I've never lost site of my own goals.  And I am proud to say that today was my last day of my last class before completing my credit hours for my bachelors degree. 
And so, to every person who looked down on me, questioned me, belittled me.  To every family member who told me I would do nothing with my life, or looked at me with sadness in their eyes.  To every in-law (not that I'm calling anyone out here) who told me I was using my husband and would never amount to anything on my own.  To every person out there that doubted me, I have only one thing to say.

Bite. Me.

No, I didn't graduate from college when some of my high school friends did.  No, I didn't do things in the order that you expected.  But I wouldn't change that for the world. 

If you ask you will receive...

My aunt turned 56 last week, and she jokingly asked my dad the week before that for a three tier cake. She told him she had never had a fancy cake before, and (thinking that he would never really make it) even specified what type of cake she was wanting for each tier.  He of course wanted to make this happen, and soooo....

The cake was finally all put together at my aunt's house and I think it turned out pretty good considering I've never done this before!  :)  I kept it super simple, and (shhhhh!) used all boxed cake mixes and icings!  But it was still delish!  Layer one was a four layer marble cake with chocolate butter cream icing...



Layer two was a 4 layer coconut cake with white coconut icing...


And layer three was a three layer Funfetti cake for the kiddos...

Over all I think it went over well... and my aunt's surprised reaction was more then worth the work! 

Our New Home?? Possibly!!

We may have found the next place we will be calling home!  I say we... but I think I really have to give the credit to my awesome husband, who actually is doing the leg work here.  I'm told it's a cute little townhouse... new appliances, modern look, fenced in yard... I'm being patiently optimistic... truthfully, right now I would be willing to move into my car, if it meant being able to sleep next to my husband every night...

I don't often share the back-story here, because I tend to get a lot of confused expressions and truly dumb questions... but it's pretty difficult to see or hear reactions on a blog, so I'll try to give the simplified version here. 

My husband and I wanted to live in Florida.  I'm from Florida, we met in Florida, Florida just felt like home.  We decided we were going to make the move to Florida in stages because finding a job for my husband was taking longer then expected.  So with our SUV and u-haul trailer all packed up, we made the two (what ended up being three awful days) trip to the Sunshine state and settled the kids and I into a beautiful, BIG house that I was in love with.  To cut out most of the middle here, it took way to long to determine that the job just was not going to work out.  We were faced with a few different options, but being that my husband is on the fast track to success at his current place of employment, making the half-a-country journey back to Texas just seemed like the most practical decision for us at the moment. 

So now the kids and I are (here comes the terrifying awful part) sharing a bedroom and a closet (I miss my shoes!!) at my parents house, and my husband is stuck at his mom's in order to save money for a new place in Texas and another LONG trip.  (Seriously, I miss my 3 4 boxes of shoes in storage!)  So finding a place puts us one step closer to finally feeling like we're home again. 

And just to throw a sentimental note at everyone (ya know, my one reader who is actually a friend, but I'm pretending tons of people are out there reading this, lol)...

It's amazing what a person can learn about themselves when they are forced to grow up.  I thought I was grown up.  At 23, with a great marriage, two little ones, and an associates degree I thought I was a real adult.  And then I was thrown into a world of being just me.  I was forced to do it all on my own and figure out the answers to my own problems and not have the hand to hold or the hug I desperately needed at the end of the day... and I did grow up.  And now I know, that no matter how great living in the city that you grew up in may be, or being close to family is, being with the people who you love more then anything in this world will always matter more.  We've been living apart and only getting to see each other every couple of months way to long now.  I now know what in my life is worth fighting for, what is worth crying for, and at the end of the day, what is worth leaving behind. 

No regrets... it's been an amazing journey... I now know that I can do it all alone... and I still choose him to make my way in this world with...

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend! 

<3 <3 <3

Jess